Sometimes, in my life, I look out off my cliff I constantly stand upon. I see the waves of fear and disappointment, failure and insubordination threatening to consume me if I were to fall off the fragile ledge I found myself on. Some days I fly. Some days I fall.
Today I fell. I felt the weight of my world creep up on me and push me off the ledge like a fifth grade bully. I try so hard to fall slowly, hoping that at some point during the trip to the bottom I'll catch myself on a tree branch of clarity, or fall onto a rock of reality. But my life, and the vigor at which I have been living it at, consumed me today. And I fell into the deep water. Cold with despair, and void of any hope, the current thrust me deeper into its abyss and stole the very strength from my weakened muscles.
I struggle to swim to the top, to breathe that fresh air of positive energy...but my energy, swallowed by the dark blue that lurks in the corners of my life, struggles to regain itself and make its way back to me. And on days like this I let it fall away, turning more into a memory than any sort of understanding.
The day will not resolve, the edge tortured me until I gave up, and let the tears of insufficiency fall. As my body lie dangling in a state of utter consumption. Emotion binding me from gathering the strength of revival. I close my eyes because I see no possibility in movement.
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